It isn't hard to feel badly about what we've done. It's often easier to judge others and their behavior towards us. That whole idea though, of passing judgment, or judging others, is often what gets us into trouble in the first place.
The Chasidic masters offer us a deeper way of thinking about the commandment, "Judges and officers shall you make in all your gates." (Numbers 16:18)
"Before anything, judge yourself, examine your own deeds first. And by the same measure you judge yourself, measure others. Do not be lenient with your faults while judging harshly the same faults in others; do not overlook sin in yourself while demanding perfection in others."—Toldot Yaakov Yoseph (Yaakov Yosef of Polonnye, d. 1782, student of the Baal Shem Tov)
This is something that we can all learn. If so, then each of us can wake up and understand that each person must learn for him/herself how to behave in the world—with justice, righteousness and compassion.—Kedushat Levi (Rabbi Levi Yitzhak of Berdichev, d. 1809, student of Dov Baer, the Magid of Mezhriech)
Each of us has within us a point of goodness—a nekudah tovah--that helps us judge others fairly and with compassion. But also, to judge ourselves fairly and with compassion.
To do: Try to identify something that you are judgmental about. Is it a behavior that you accept in yourself, but not others? Is it something that you tolerate in others, but berate yourself over?Seek a balance between the inward and outward work of teshuvah.
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